Have you ever laughed hysterically at a television show or movie about an over-demanding bride? Maybe she is screaming at everyone or throwing tables. Or maybe she is not over-demanding but is at her maximum threshold for stress. It may be funny to see a movie with a bride stuffing her tear-streaked face with the groom’s cake before the ceremony; laughing at that in real life, however, would be less than acceptable. And obviously, no one wants to BE that bride.
With the expectations created for us by reality television shows, misleading social media posts, and Pinterest boards, it can be hard to settle for anything less than a perfectly elegant wedding (with just the right amount of burlap and mason jars to show we are still down-to-earth). While our rational sides realize that no wedding is perfect, we cannot help but think that OURS must be. With that pressure, we are bound to snap at some point.
Here are a few ways to avoid becoming that screaming, stress-eating pile of nerves:
- Delegate tasks. This can be hard if you are a perfectionist. If you are a stickler for details and used to doing things for yourself, delegate WISELY. On the morning of my wedding, I was still trying to decorate the area for the ceremony. Two of my trustworthy bridesmaids came along and insisted on taking over for me so I could leave for my hair appointment. Your bridesmaids are there because they care about you. ASK them to help. If they really deserve to be in your wedding, they will not mind helping, as long as you ASK instead of demanding.
- If possible, have both the ceremony and reception at the same location. This limits the number of people that you (and whoever is helping to plan and/or finance the wedding) have to communicate with, and it cuts transportation concerns for everyone involved in the wedding.
- Try not to have too many big changes happening at the same time as your wedding. For example, it is okay if the honeymoon does not happen immediately after the wedding. You will not be any less married if that trip happens a few days (or months) later!
- Do not feel bad about not inviting people. Weddings are expensive. Consult your budget and prioritize. Chances are, the person who is not invited will have to make the same decisions for their own wedding at some point, and they will understand.
- Take care of your health during the wedding planning. Eating less to fit into your dress is not sufficient. Be sure you are eating NUTRITIOUS foods, drinking enough water, getting adequate sleep, exercising, and finding healthy ways to manage your stress (e.g., hiking, yoga, or journaling).
- Finally, do not forget to ENJOY your wedding. When the day arrives, it will fly by. Don’t sweat small things like not having a cake server. Enjoy every moment and celebrate this amazing occasion!